It was a cold Saturday, December 18 at 6PM. Liz and I were going to be married the next afternoon. We were walking downtown in Henderson, Tennessee, when I looked up and saw the courthouse. It hit me that I forgot to pick up our marriage license. Did I mention it was Saturday night?

It was a terrifying moment for me. Relatives from Texas had driven hundreds of miles. The cake was made. The rings were bought. The church was ready. Obviously I was not in charge of any of those things. Liz had even gone with me to purchase the marriage license. In preparation for the wedding she had only given me the job of picking up the marriage license.

It was a cold Saturday, December 18 at 6PM. There was a chill in the air, but the chill did not come from the temperature outside. The chill came from the young lady walking with me.

My failure should have been a warning to her, but apparently she had a learning disability. What she did next amazed me. She called the county clerk and had him open the courthouse and get our license!

The event may be different, but if you are married, your wedding also had a mess-up, a slip-up, or an up-oh moment. Over the years I have talked to many couples and never have I found one that did not have one. Maybe yours is an exception, but I doubt it.

Wedding ceremonies are not wonderful because they are perfect. Marriages are not great because they have are uh-ho moment free.

Marriages are successful because the two people in the marriage have learned to see past the past, live in the day, and embrace tomorrow. Your partner is not perfect. If he or she were then they would not have married you. They would have been looked for someone one who is perfect. In spite of that, “Husbands, love your wives.” (Eph 5:25) Wives, respect your husband. (Eph 5:33)

Do this even if he forgets the wedding license. If he did forget, then forget about the “up-oh” moment. Mine did, or at least if she remembered it, she never mentioned it again.

Lonnie Davis

A few days ago, my wife, my daughter, my grandkids and I took a short road trip. Okay, so it was a 275 mile road trip. When I take one of those by myself it is short. When you take them with a wife, a daughter and two grandkids, it is not so short. I had forgotten what it is like to travel with kids. On our trip there we stopped six times. The first time was for me to get money. The other five times were for kids.

The next morning I took the kids down for the free continental breakfast. I got food for each kid and then went to cook a waffle. I took it to the table. I went back to cook a second waffle. I got my food and sat down. I had to get up to get syrup. Finally I sat down to eat. I didn’t know about bathroom breaks during breakfast – another interruption. Finally mom arrived and I could eat.

What does that have to do with the title “Passages?”

Gail Sheehy wrote a book called “Passages.” In her work she says that life has many passages. As we grow we change. Life in our twenties is different than life in our thirties. Life in our fifties finds that we have gone through many passages. Life is different.

The wise man wrote, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven.” (Eccl 3:1)

Life changes.

It is okay.

It is great.

Joy does not come because we are in a great place. Joy comes by enjoying the place wherever we are. Coming back it was just Liz and me. Going down we had six stops and lots of laughter. Coming back there were no stops and no laughter. I missed the stops. Enjoy wherever you are in life. It is all you have. It is the passage you are in. Savor it.

Lonnie Davis